Speech techniques in psychological counseling.

Every statement has a certain degree of generalization, which means that it is not true in all cases, ie, you can always find a situation in which it is false. More Tiutchev said: "The thought expressed is a lie." Accordingly, theoretically, any of the following proposed methods can be used to make any statement. Of course, if we do case studies that not all methods are adequate but, at the initial stage of training, training for psychological thinking will be useful to practice.
It is important to understand the context of the situation and motives of the client, it will help to use speech strategies adequately.
 
Abstracting from the situation. It is best used when a person is stuck on the sensations in a particular situation, and is unable to make any generalizations and theoretical conclusions. Questions of a series of "general", "What is all this? What do mean? "
  
Clarification of concepts. Ask the subject to explain what he meant by that saying. The question of the series: "What is ...?" Or "What do you mean when you say ...?". It refers to the separate concepts. Ex .: "I am depressed ..." The response: "What is depression? How is it specifically you have seen? "" Describe a real case. "
  
The expression in the speech lack of choice: "I must, I must, I can not, it's necessary."
"We have to do it on Saturday." The response: "What happens if you do not do this?", "What's stopping you?"
"I can not tell him the truth." The response: "What happens if you tell him the truth." "What's stopping you?"
 
Use adverbs such as the client is clear, of course, is obvious, of course, surprising, and so on. P.Primer:
"It is obvious that she is cheating on him." Reaction: "For some people (who) it is obvious?" "Based on what you have come to this conclusion?" "On what grounds, you have determined that she is cheating on him?"
"It is clear that he fell in love with her." The response: "Who is right?"
 
Transforming static characteristics in behavior.
The characteristics derived from the behaviors they need to return to the level of behavior. Sample questions:
How to behave as a husband, to be seen as "the mattress"?
How does the wife when her condition is described as "depressing"?
 
Reformulate a noun into a verb.
"I have not been rendered due recognition." The response: "How would you like that you recognize?"
"During the classes in the audience did not have a proper understanding." Reaction: "On what grounds can you define what you understand."
"I need help". The response: "How would you like to help you?"
"Fear of the dark binds me." The response: "What exactly are you afraid of?"
"My love for her makes me vulnerable." The response: "How exactly do you love her?"
"I did not have the courage to do it." The response: "What you need to you dare to do it?"
"I feel fear." Reaction: "And as it passed your test?"
 
Unjustified conclusions.
"If he loved me, he would come to work on time." Reaction: "He does not love you, how exactly does that manifest itself?"; "What makes him late to come to work."
"My daughter is the same frivolous, like her father." Reaction: "Her father is not serious, what exactly is it manifested?"
 
Unambiguous statement that an event in any case, cause a person to act a certain way or to feel a certain emotion.
"The fact that you put the dirty dishes in the sink, annoys me." The response: "How does what I have dirty dishes in the sink can annoy you?"
"The evening is unfortunate, because you have come too late." The response: "How is my tardiness says that the evening is not good?"
 
The causal relationship, which is not an absolute, but presented to as unconditional.
"I would like to be not so irritable, but I have to deal with lazy people." The response: "You are always annoyed when dealing with lazy people?" "You have the opportunity to get away from communicating with lazy people." "What's stopping you to find people with whom you want to communicate?"
 
Representation of a client that a person can know or feel something without direct this message.
"Everyone thinks I'm taking too much time." The response: "Exactly how do you know that everyone thinks so?"
"I'm sure you can see how I feel." The response: "How exactly do you make sure that I can see how you feel?"
"I know what is best for him." The response: "How did you find out?"
"He never thinks about the consequences." The response: "How exactly do you know that he never thinks about the consequences?"
"He should have known that I would like to receive flowers from him," The reaction of: "How could he guess about this."
"We can not predict all possible situations." The response: "Have I understood you correctly, you are not convinced that meaningful to you the situation will evolve as you want?"
 
Accounting context. Rate the value and effectiveness of the psychological characteristics of behavior is possible only in the context of a particular situation.
Sample questions:
How, exactly, manifests itself problematic behavior?
What situations push to problem behavior, and how hard it manifests itself?
What people are present at the same time and how they react?
What precedes the problem situation?
What is the sequence of steps in a problem situation?
 
Demonstration of the relative positions of the victims and the perpetrators. Each participant of the problem situation is an actor, respectively, there is a share of its participation in the issue.
For example, in consultation with the mother of his son.
Question son:
"If desired, the behavior of your mother, which now complain about how you could do this?"
Answer son:
"I would have ...".
Question to the mother:
"If you want to get the son, so he did ... that you had to do?" And the like.
 
Review of the problem in the time term. Issues related to the changes in the past and possible changes in the future. Formation of the idea of the results obtained. It is suggesting that the transformations are possible in principle. Questions from the series:
"What if?" Or "Imagine a situation where your problem has already been solved."
When you feel that the situation has become a problem?
How long do you think it can last?
 
Please give a specific example of how real this was. It should be done when a person speaks in general. Often this is expressed in the use of non-specific verb. For example: "It offends me." Reaction "How did he specifically does, please give a concrete example of life, as it happened?"
"He rejects me." The response: "How was he who rejects you?"
"Children make me punish them." The response: "Exactly how children make you punish them?"
 
The clarification of values: family and individual.
Issues related to agree or disagree on the basic values of family and cultural environment, to which the family belongs.
Who seek autonomy, and who, above all, think about the good of the family, and what are their motives?
In case of a conflict of values, who would choose what position?
What values are dominant in a particular family?
 
Family myths, stories, concept.
Family history form the general interpretative schemes peculiar family, allowing to explain that for the family as a whole and for its individual members means the behavior of participants in a conflict situation.
What are the stories and myths about the past, present and future are told in the family?
How it is made to explain what is happening in the story?
Are the presentation, based on which is due to what is happening in the history common to all members of the family or not?
What are the views on how to achieve the goal, there are in the family?
 
Generalization. (Generalization).
"Nobody loves me." The response: "Who exactly do you want to be loved?"
"People by nature are greedy and evil." The response: "Who exactly do you think greedy and evil?"
"I do not get." The response: "What exactly do you not get?"
"I never do anything right." The response: "You never do anything right?" "Did you ever do anything right?"
"You can not get what I want." The response: "Have you ever got what they wanted?" "In which case it's impossible?"
"It is wrong to rely on charity." The response: "Who is it wrong?
"That's the way it should be done." The response: "Who needs to do it right?"
"So you can not do." The response: "This is impossible to do so, in what circumstances?"
"I have no respect." The response: "Who is it you do not respect?"
"I do not understand anything". The response: "What do not you understand?"
"I'm afraid". The response: "What or who are you afraid of?"
"I do not like him". The response: "What exactly is it you do not like?" When? Where?...
"He is the best". Reaction: "He's the best in what?"
"He listens better than anyone." Reaction: "He who listens to the best?"
"He listens to me better than anyone." Reaction: "He listens to you best, under what circumstances?"
 
Questions about intra coalitions and subsystems.
Between which family members at the moment, there are coalitions and how they are stable and predictable?
What, who, and who does?
By what criteria can be determined that the coalition has changed.
What are the rules exist in certain respects?
Whose goals, opinions and the like, the same, and whose - not?
 
Questions to some one, about the relationship between the other two.
How, in terms of, for example, the mother looks like the relationship of father and son?
 
The alignment of the hierarchy on any criterion among family members.
Scaling (estimate something in points). For example:
If you build a hierarchy of relative ... who would have been the first, the second, the last ...?
 
Intrafamily relationship changes and changes outside the family.
What changes are at work, at school, in relationships with friends and acquaintances, age, biological changes, any of the members of the family can be associated with changes in family relationships?
 
The desire to preserve unchanged something that is directly related to the problem.
What should not be changed under any circumstances?
What is the situation that prevailed at the moment of good?
 
Issues relating to the assumptions and thought experiments.
Assumptions, thought experiments, make it possible to lose the possible alternative scenarios, whether in the past or in the future.
Every question has a suggestive influence, making certain assumptions. In this sense, interviews simultaneously has properties of intervention.
Edward Makarenko